Ten White Men in a Row

A testosterone-hyped field of 10 white men went mano a mano on the Iraq war and torture last night in their debate battle for the GOP nomination . With a couple of refreshing exceptions.

Rep. Ron Paul of Texas (who, by the way, has a corn dog's chance at the Iowa State Fair of getting a bite on the nomination) stood his lonely ground by denouncing the decision to go to war in Iraq, the use of torture and even suggested that terrorists actions like 9/11 were in part in retaliation for the United States' actions in the world, saying "If we ignore that, we ignore that at our risk."

This gave the question-dodging and debate-floundering America's mayor, Rudy Giuliani, the opening he needed for chest thumping, challenging Paul's statement as an "absurd explanation for September 11." We know what Paul was trying to say, but this forum wanted napalm in the morning.

Sen. John McCain of Arizona also rejected the use of torture explaining he's been there and had that done unto him.... and, the thing that kept him and his fellow POW's going was the fact that their country wasn't like that. Of course, McCain stayed with his support of the surge in Iraq, at this point he really has no choice.

Former Arkansas governor Mike Huckabee delivered the best zinger, joking that in recent years Congress had "spent money like John Edwards at a beauty shop." This campaign season the GOP will make sure that Edwards keeps paying for his $400 haircut.

Mitt Romney, former governor of Massachusetts, was articulate, polished, knowledgeable and well.... perfect. I could hear the casting call. Would someone please put a big spot on his tie?

Former governor James Gilmore, as a poll bottom-feeder, tried to make points by challenging the true conservatism of McCain, Giuliani and Romney. They easily dodged his barbs and he faded once again into the Virginia countryside.

Rep.Tom Tancredo of Colorado delivered the second best zinger aimed at his GOP rivals changing positions... "I trust those conversions when they happen on the road to Damascus, not on the road to Des Moines." But strangely, he gave a shallow reply on a question about illegal immigration, his calling card. It didn't turn out to be a trump.

A glib Sen. Sam Brownback of Kansas put on a good performance, but it seemed a performance.

Rep. Duncan Hunter of California was on point on defense issues and immigration. His concise responses were refreshing.

And that leaves only Elmer Fudd, the former Wisconsin gov Tommy Thompson, who seemed to be down-shifted to low gear.... upstaged perhaps by the other Thompson, Fred, the Thompson the GOP electorate is panting for although he has yet to announce, let alone debate. According to the latest polls, Fred is even eating into Giuliani's leading position.

I had predicted, and anticipated, that a debate sponsored by FOX News and hosted by Brit Hume would be one long GOP commercial, all softballs and no substance. I was wrong. It was the best debate by either party so far, although probably partly because the candidates are becoming better at it. And mixing it up a bit.

I also looked for the 10 white men to trip over each other in expressing their sympathy over the death that day of Rev. Jerry Falwell who spearheaded the Moral Majority winning GOP strategy. But wisely, Hume nipped that rush in the bud at the outset of the debate by expressing their unified regret so the candidates wouldn't need to do so individually.

The other no-show thus far in the GOP field is former House speaker Newt Gingrich who is dangling the "great possibility" of his candidacy. At least his timing may be propitious, he is slated to deliver the commencement address at Falwell's university on Saturday.... there could be no better center stage than before a grieving GOP base.

GOP Hopefuls Opine

The first Republican presidential candidates "debate" last night was in many respects a yawn.... but, it did have a crazy-aunt-in-the-attic moment for the ten Bush wanna-bes.

When asked for a show of hands for those who didn't believe in evolution..... the flat-earthers responding were Sen. Sam Brownback of Kansas, former Arkansas governor Mike Huckabee and Rep. Tom Tancredo of Colorado. These three definitely go to the back of the class with the slow-learners.

I kept looking for the apple that former Massachusetts governor Mitt Romney had on hand for MSNBC moderator Chris Matthews.... Mitt is such a perfect teacher's pet.... well prepared, face scrubbed, not a hair out of place.... just too perfect. We need a Mitt Romney doll, just wind him up and he delivers his focus-group talking-points to the background of Hail-to-the-Chief.

Sen. John McCain of Arizona was animated, although he had a momentary "deer in headlights" moment when asked directly if he believed in evolution. He did give the old straight talk answer of "yes".... before shifting into his Falwell pandering-gear by adding when he's in the Grand Canyon, he sees God's hand over the horizon.

Actually, what McCain sees over the horizon is Joe Lieberman's hand waving his Straight Talk Express into the lane for presidential race losers. When asked what Democrat he would have in his cabinet if he became president, McCain named Lieberman with the same passion usually reserved for a hot prom date.

A subdued former New York mayor Rudy Giuliani was the only one of the ten to hedge over whether the Supreme Court should overturn Roe v. Wade.... although he made it clear that he "hates" abortion, as if rival Democrats or anyone supporting a woman's right to chose doesn't hate abortion. The other nine took the GOP safe "overturn" path, each trying to out-forceful-reply the other.

Rep. Ron Paul of Texas was the only one not supporting The Decider's troop buildup in Iraq, and actually mentioned GOP-abandoned items like upholding the Constitution and reducing spending. His biggest contribution, however, was that he made McCain appear young.

The former governor of Wisconsin, Tommy Thompson.... not Fred who kept his standing by not being in the lineup.... had the best Ronald Reagan brown-nose line recalling Reagan's optimism and "belief that America could be stronger and better tomorrow than it is today"... which is perfectly true as soon as we can rid ourselves of the Bush mafia.

California Rep. Duncan Hunter (great name) thinks he's the reincarnation of Patton.... but he didn't move his campaign forward much with so many other stage-generals trying to show their commander-in-chief mettle.

James Gilmore, former governor of Virginia didn't move the audience recognition needle much off 0.... what is it with former governors? Being a big fish in Virginia's pond doesn't equate to making a splash in the national ocean.

And that's how I saw it, the Republican debate. McCain perhaps summed up his party's "be very afraid" mantra the best.... "We must win in Iraq.... If we withdraw, there will be chaos, there will be genocide and they will follow us home."

No. A Democrat must win the election.... or, there will be chaos, there will be more war and corruption, and the GOP will follow us into our homes.